BlogYYY
Monday, February 9, 2009,6:09 AM
How To Avoid Negativity
One of our great challenges in life is to avoid negativity - a negative attitude to ourselves and others. It is easy to become suspicious, critical, depressed, fearful, but, despite the prevailing attitudes of the world there is no inevitability that we have to become a grumpy old man. It is quite possible to see the beautiful in the ordinary and bring to the fore the better side of human nature. If we avoid negativity we will see definitely see the positive in life and enjoy life much more.
Criticise Not
Criticising others is a very pervasive bad habit we all have. Sometimes we can actually go out of our way to look for the failings and faults of others. It is as if we are blind to their good qualities but their mistakes stand out in our mind. Even worse we can often imagine faults that others might have. This is the height of stupidity, but the nature of the mind can easily turn to negativity and we have to be on guard.
It is a great exercise to try and think about the good aspects of people whom you frequently criticise. The important thing is that criticising others has an unmistakeable impact on ourselves. If we are permanently finding fault with the world it affects our self.
To deliberately criticiseAnother individualMay cause an indelible stainOn the critic.
The world will not collapse if we halt our self styled criticism. If we look to encourage and praise the good aspects of others, we will bring these qualities to the fore in ourself.
Choosing Consciously
All the time we are faced with choices. Do I see the negative or the positive? Somebody at work might pass a thoughtless and disparaging comment. Our instinctive reaction may be to nurse a sense of grievance and think of many equally unpleasant things to say about the person in return. However, another way to look at this situation would be to think. They are unfortunately wrong, perhaps they are feeling insecure and so try to unfairly put others down. In the past there may have been times when I may have done something like that. I will make an effort to be kind to that person as this will be the best way to show they were mistaken and also to help them overcome their depressed state of mind.
The first response invites a tit for tat response which will encourage negativity. The second response is dignified and requires nobility of character. But, we lose nothing by avoiding negativity - we gain a tremendous amount. The point is we always have a choice about how we respond to situations; avoiding the negative and unpleasant just takes a conscious decision.
Self-Belief
It is vital to cultivate a sense of self-worth and self-respect. If we do not have faith in ourselves how can we have faith in anyone else? Self-belief should not be equated with arrogance or pride. We are seeking to cultivate a sense of self respect so we are at peace with ourselves. We are often our worst critic, sometimes we ignore genuine faults but worry excessively over minor issues that aren’t really faults. We need to learn from our mistakes and be honest with our weaknesses but it should not be at a cost of putting ourselves down. If we make a mistake learn to let go, don’t keep the negative memory at the forefront of your mind. If we can have a good feeling about ourselves it will be very easy to have a good feeling about others and the rest of the world.
Service
Idleness is the worst cultivator of negativity. If we sit mopping aimlessly around we will inevitable become bored and negative. Life will seem no fun. The easiest way to change our mindset is to become meaningfully busy. As we mentioned in this story about ‘helping an alcoholic’ it was only when the alcoholic helped other people that he was able to overcome his personal weaknesses. If we really want to serve others there will always be some way that we can find. If we are really busy we will not have time to criticise the world. If we don’t have work to do, we can also just take physical exercise. This is also an excellent way of shaking off the cobwebs of our mind.
Osmosis.
The nature of the human mind is that it consciously or unconsciously absorbs the vibrations from around us. If we spend time with negative people, watching 24 hour news, then we will be more prone to negativity ourselves. We have to choose our work, leisure time carefully. Don’t spend too much time with the grumpy old men or gossipy old ladies. When we do spend time with negative people we need to be on our guard that we don’t share their world view.
Be young At Heart.
I have already made two references to ‘grumpy old men’ this is not an ageist remark. You can be a grumpy old man when you are 20. You can be 80 years old but remain young at heart. Age is very much something of a mental attitude. We want to cultivate a childlike attitude which takes joy from small, simple, beautiful things. We want to avoid a great sophistication and mental disection of everything. If we over analyse life we are living in the mind and unable to live in the heart.
,5:43 AM
Let All Your True Love & Care FILL THE AIR...
T.R.U.E F.R.I.E.N.D.SWhat does
TRUE FRIENDS means to us?
T rust
R espect
U nderstanding
E mpathy
F orgiveness
R esponsiveness
I nsight
E xpression of love
N eeding one another
D ependability
S piritual connection
..." You have not live a perfect day...unless you have done something for someone who will never be able to repay you."...-Ruth SmeltzerAre we willing to
SACRIFICE ourselves for someone whom u knew is unable to repay you?
Do you have give a
HELPING HAND for people in needs?
-TRUE FRIENDS GIVE A HELPING HAND.H earing what's needed
E ager to contribute
L istening with compassion
P aying attention to the little things
I nitiative and inituitive to understand what is helpful,what is not
N ever overstepping your bounds
G oing out of your way for a true friend
H ealing love, healing touch
A sking "what I can do to help?"
N ever assuming that you know what's best
D esiring to serve & contribute to other's well-being
... "God gives us our relatives.Thank God we can choose our friends." ...-Ethel Watts , MumfordNovelist, humor writer Laughter is the best medicine for our life and bring a closer distance between people.
True friends, they share the smile and laughter for the happy moments
and shed tears with us for the sad moments.
L oving life,with its ups and downs
A ppreciating what's right with the world
U nderstanding your own quirks & eccentricities
G oing for the gusto
H aving fun wherever & whenever you can
T aking life seriously but taking yourself lightly
E ager to embrace life's lunacies
R eady to grin at every opportunity
Do we love others with
unconditional love?
Be a true friends , learn to love unconditionally.
U nlimited Love
N o judgement or criticism
C onstancy over time
O pen arms , open mind
N o strings, limits or pre-requisites
D oing what's right
I ntend to listen and learn
T ime and attention generously given
I nterdependence
O pen heart , open home
N eeding one another
A ffirming other's goodness
L oyalty in good times & bad
In those down times of our life , we face suffering and
STRUGGLE.Loneliness arises and we felt helpless.Is a blessing to have a true friends with you for two is always better than one.
Now in your mind, think of a friend whom you called as "TRUE FRIENDS".
Next, spell out his/her name.SPELL OUT LOUD!!!!=)
Count your blessings now by this person.
Whisper a prayer for this beloved person you have.
Lastly,cherish every chance of yours to express your love
for the person you really care and concern of.
S ee obstacles as temporaries,not permanent
T ry many different approaches
R ally friends and supporters to help
U nderstand that struggles makes us stronger
G ive yourself time to rest and regroup occasionally
G ather the resources you need to prevail
L et go of limiting beliefs
E njoy & celebrate your progress,no matter how slow or sporadic
How do we forgive others?
Forgive & forget , did we strive for it?
F eel your hurtO pen your heartR elease your angerG ive love a chanceI nquire within your heartV enture into dialogueE mbrace the other personN udge yourself to keep at it ,even you don't want toE njoy new possibilities & freedomS eek divine guidance and helpS avor your new serenity and peaceWhen we give,do we seek returns?
Do we hold condition or expectation when we give?
G oing the extra mile
I nvolved in each other's life
V ested interest in mutual well-being
I nterested in helping out
N eeding one another
G rowing by giving
B eing gracious & kind
A cknowledge one another's love
C ommunicating lovingly, honestly
K eeping commitments to one another
..." True friendship is not about give and take.They are about give & give"...- Anonymous -The ability to provide
SERVICE for others is also a blessing.
Do we have the heart to serve others by going the extra mile?
S elfless
E mpathy
R eliability
V itality
I ntegrity
C ommitment
E xpecting nothing in return
When a person get to know another person,they become friends.
As more and more people get together,it forms a
COMMUNITY.
How do we form a friendly community to widen the network of friends?
C oming together
O pen arms,open hearts,open minds
M utual respect
M utual support
U nderstanding differences
N ever losing sight of common goals
I ntegrity-both individuals & collective
T rust & truth
Y earning for healthy interdependence
TRUE FRIENDS "A" to "Z"A ccept your warts & all
B elieve in your potential
C omfort you when you're sad
D elight in your successes
E mphatize with your struggle
F orgive you when you hurt their feelings, just as you do for them
G ive you time & attention
H ugs you ... often
I nspire you to do your best
J ust love you
K eep your secrets
L isten with their hearts
M ake you wanna be a better person
N ever judge you
O ccasionally disappoint you , 'cause they are human too
P oint out your good qualities when you forget
Q uestion you when you are about to do something really dumb
R espect your boundaries
S hare their hopes and fears with you
T ell you the truth
U nderstand you , even when you don't understand yourself
V alue your ideas & opinions
W illing to do anything they can to help you
X tend you the benefit of the doubt
Y earn to hear from you when you are away
Z ing with joy 'cause you're their friend
Hope people out there reading this post are inspired.
May everyone are blessed with true friends that worth you to be joyful for a whole lifetime.
Cheerz,
Rainbow.~
Wen~ =)
Friday, February 6, 2009,10:24 PM
ThE ArT Of DoInG NoThInG...
“I used to have a friend who sat around doing nothing, but then he took up meditation.”
It’s a rather feeble new Age joke, but, the idea of doing nothing sounds rather shocking, yet doing nothing can be one of the most rewarding things. Here doing nothing doesn’t mean loafing away, idly passing time. Doing nothing means the willingness to switch off from external distractions and worries. It means being happy to be in our present surroundings and at peace with ourself.
Time to Yourself
We spend time looking after our family, commuting to work; we work 8 hours a day for a boss. Why do we find it so difficult to spend 15 - 20 minutes to ourselves?
Don’t Be Afraid of Silence
We have become afraid of our own selves, and afraid of silence. We have become accustomed to absorbing ourselves in external distractions, often looking at a screen. Because, we never spend time with ourselves we become frightened of what we might find. Real silence is relaxing and reinvigorating. We need to learn to be at peace with ourselves. We must avoid the temptation to start judging ourselves and other people but, just be in peace.
Less is More
We often have a feeling that we need to try and control everything. We need to change others behaviour, we need to change ourselves, we need to change the world. We expend alot of energy ruminating over the failings of others and what they ought to do. Often this is just on a mental level. Our thoughts are filled with what other people should do and why they are bad. But, in many cases we would be better off for minding our own business. There are many things that we are not responsible for, especially when it comes to changing other people. We can inspire them and lead by example, but, sometimes we need to allow people to make their own choices and follow their own path. In that area we should be happy to do nothing. We can offer people our good will, but, we should not feel responsible for their mistakes.
Doing Nothing with a Purpose
We are doing nothing when we surf through the internet, watch some daytime cooking programme or check our email for a record 16th time in the past two hours. We can be in the vortex of activity but achieve nothing meaningful. The problem is we rush into activity without any preparation or thought. The art of doing nothing involves gaining an inner preparation, a mental stillness and cultivating an inner peace which gives meaning to our outer life. Meditation is the active cultivation of this inner silence and inner peace. It is the best way to gain a meaningful inner peace.
We can also just be more aware of the simplicity of life and nature. We can rush through the most beautiful scenery in the world, but, if we are absorbed in something else, it will be of no benefit. If we pursue simplicity and awareness we will appreciate many simple things alot more.
Don’t Be Defensive
It is not nice being criticised either directly or implicitly, but sometimes we worry too much and become very defensive. Learning to pay no heed of misinformed criticism can be a real boon for us.
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Hello. We are RaInBoWz ChIlD. We are 18 to 19 years old. We love GOD, but we don't hate